Yesterday was one of those days where the

reality of this disease hits.  I never wanted to

be on pain medication that is strong and addictive

but I’ve heard other Christians say they can’t live

without them and they are a blessing not a curse.

Really?  I guess they are in a sense because the

pain would keep me in bed otherwise.  I have to look

at it that way instead of I never wanted to do this.

I want to believe God will heal me of this but sometimes

I forget to look up and only see what’s in front of me, or

feel what's inside of me.  I guess too I was frustrated because I

was told I would only be paying 25$ every time I get

an Xgeva shot and then got a bill for $2565.38.  All the

phone numbers I tried to call yesterday, trying to

get it resolved, said leave a message.  They didn’t

call back.  So I’ll be on the phone again today trying

to get it straightened out.   I have to focus on

the good not the bad but it’s hard sometimes. 

The good:  I’m getting to stay home and paint and

read (I’m reading 5 books and the Bible through in a year)

and spend more time with my family. Although

I haven’t been painting much – time to get to work!

Some photos from the Winter Park Art Show

 My brother painting the side of the house for

Chuck's birthday.  Awesome!

I haven’t been painting much – time to get to work!

Maybe I've been over doing it lately but I really hurt. It could be this new medication Xgeva.

I don't know but my bones ache and some feel like they did when the Dr. told me my ribs were fractured. My teeth hurt too which can be a side effect of the Xgeva.

But I am more mobile. I actually went somewhere without my cane. Chuck took me to the beach today and I walked. Not too far. It was really nice but really crowded.

Right now I should be sleeping so I will.

Oh, and I'm reading a great book The Circle Maker by Mark Batterson - my brother bought it

for me. Thanks Stuart!

I have art show pictures I need to post too which I really enjoyed, very slowly, but I think that made it better. I'll try to post them tomorrow.

Randomness

Random Tuesday

This is the barley life I drink for

breakfast. It looks nasty and it

tastes -well like whatever you

mix it with- and grass with a little

sand. But it's supposed to be good for you.

And I've kind of gotten used to it.

Corey's cat Alfred has finally made it outside.

He really enjoys his time outdoors.

I finished this little 31/4"x4 1/2"

clay tile piece.

I wanted to make a card

out of this watercolor I painted.

I actually did another painting

of it on a card. I think I know where

it's going.

Jesse came by today and took me to

Michael's - always fun.

Not feeling all that well today.

But she made me feel better.

Been one of those weeks where I was really dreading something that I didn't need to.

The Dr.'s appointment was fine. It was really just a check to see how I'm doing. I had

a lot of questions. Some got answered some didn't.

I figured out why I was dreading it so much. I had a few people mention chemo to me and

why hadn't I had it. I remember from the beginning my oncologist said no that she was going

to try different methods to save my life. She said she wanted to keep me healthy and that

chemo wouldn't do that. I agreed whole heartedly and still do.

So it ended up being a rather ordinary visit, except for increasing pain pills and making

an appointment to get measured for a sleeve so I can take a trip. A sleeve is like compression

stockings for your arm, if you've had lymph nodes removed, it keeps the blood flowing properly.

The increase of the pain medication makes me ill and unable to function normally (can't stay

awake) so we're going to have to figure out another alternative.